Words Wisdom - Leave Judgers in the Dust

Posted by Vince Poscente on Thu, Mar 22, 2012 @ 10:09 AM

Some personal development phrases haunt your thoughts. Here’s one by Longfellow that has echoed over time:

“We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing,

while others judge us by what we have already done.”

Flashback to the request to be a judge at a beauty contest in the small town of Altus, Oklahoma. Somehow, the achievement of competing in the Olympics and being a motivational speaker/business consultant (what you’ve ‘already done’) was interpreted as being ‘capable of’ judging a pageant.

Huh? (Somebody got confused in their sales training class.)

But, you accept. Why not?

During backstage interviews, one young lady admits, “This is my second pageant.”

“What did you learn from competing last year?” you ask, poised to take notes.

“To smile more,” she says, followed by a grin highlighting missing teeth. Your pen twitches involuntarily.

Another teenager takes her place. You inquire, “What do you want to do after you graduate from high school?”

With no lack of motivation she says, “I would like to be a brain surgeon,” swishing her hair off her shoulder, “and if that doesn’t work out, I’d like to be a hairstylist.” You put the ballpoint down before it takes flight.

You turn to the adjudicator beside you and groan, “I don’t like judging people.”

In that moment of clarity, you flash further back to a challenge from a friend using motivational techniques on you. She threw down a goal that seemed easy enough to grasp. Yet, two decades later speaking from one corporate event to another, it has been consistently and uncomfortably either a fingertip out of reach or impossible to hold on to.

Stop judging.

Don’t judge others. Don’t judge yourself. Don’t judge situations.

Try it for a day. If you can’t do a day, try it for the next hour.

If that’s tough, try it for five minutes.

“We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing,

while others judge us by what we have already done.”

Judgment. Ugh!!!

You accepted the challenge to stop judging for the next day - hour - few minutes. Twenty years later, you still can’t master the test. Rationally, it makes sense. Little good can come from judging yourself, being judged, judging others or even judging situations. How can you truly know if you’re right or wrong, if a person is good or bad, if a situation is ultimately positive or negative?

(And don’t confuse judging with categorizing. That red burner is hot. Categorization. That redhead is hot. Judgment.)

Yet, somewhere in our genetic makeup we continue to judge ourselves, others and situations. Why, why, WHY?

“We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing,

while others judge us by what we have already done.”

What are you capable of?

Improved patience? More joy? Eating better? Regular exercise? Reinvention?

Yet, at the same time, others may look at you as a patient, joyful, strong and enterprising.

Lighten your load. Let go of judgment!

Accept you are capable. Now move forward with joy, not regret.

Others have their opinion. Move on and leave the judgers in your dust.

employee motivation


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Vince Poscente is the founder of BIG GOALS in Short Order, New York Times bestselling author of The Age of Speed, The Ant and the Elephant and Invinceable Principles. As a competitor in the Olympic Winter Games and master communicator on reaching BIG GOALS in less time he too still looks for ways to leave judgers in the dust.

For more information on letting go of judgment, order your copy

of Invinceable Principles (see or hear Chapter 4)

  Vince Poscente Besteller Book audio book  

Tags: Self Development, Motivational